I find something curious in the situation we have experienced, a dichotomy if you will; there are feelings of being taken advantage of, ripped off, betrayed, et cetera, hence viewing Dr. Teich as a crook, evil, criminal, et cetera. Yet on the other hand reports of positive interactions, caring and compassionate interactions with Dr. Teich, unrelated doctors stating he did good surgical work, nice, and beautiful lab work. Some patients have had their work completed and some not. I feel I’m in the unique position of not only having experienced the same, but to be reading and hearing in phone conversations of the dichotomies expressed which puts me in an interesting position.
So, if we take a viewpoint of him in the positive, then we question how he could have done this. In that questioning we feel confused, self doubting (“how could I have been so wrong?”). That confusion and self doubt, being uncomfortable propels us to the viewpoint of him in the negative: in the negative, we feel anger, and again self doubt (“how did I not see this”). Seems no matter how we try to resolve it, while in either side, we feel discomfort. I’m wondering if anyone is relating to this to a lesser or greater degree?
As a result of feeling, hearing and reading the opposing ideas about him over the last few months, something mentally and emotionally shifted inside me, just in the past 24 hours. This shift went from bouncing back and forth between positive to negative to being separated from above or below the two sides.
Putting it graphically (P = Positive, N = Negative, V = Viewpoint – mine)
P <– V –> N to V or P N
/ \ \ /
P N V
As a result of this shift, my internal discomfort began decreasing and is dissipating. Then, last night while reading with the TV on, I caught part of a conversation out of the corner of my ear, on Bill Moyer (have never watched him before) in which I partially heard the interviewee say something about holding opposing ideas and mentioning the name, Fitzgerald. So I went to the Internet and look what I found:
“The test of a first-rate intelligence is the ability to hold two opposed ideas in mind at the same time and still retain the ability to function. One should, for example, be able to see things as hopeless and yet be determined to make them otherwise.” – F. Scott Fitzgerald
Isn’t that what we are doing here?